Dating in Modern Time

Hello wonderful people Sevsland is back! I would like to start off with saying I am so sorry for the delay. My blog was put on pause these couple of weeks due to work and family matters. I've been thinking of this topic for some time now and kept going back and forth on it. I want to share with you why I think dating is hard.

I find myself to be an extrovert but i do have moments were I can be an introvert. I enjoy new adventures and learning new things from others but I also like to be in my bed and listen to music while reading books. For instance when I am out with my girlfriends we tend to always have a good time because we tend to crazy things and we start conversations with people we cross paths with and make new friends. However, when it comes to talking to someone that I might like I can be seen as more reserved but that's because I tend to be nervous meeting the person for the first time. Why is this? I am not sure, it could possibly be nerves and overthinking every little thing. I've been working on this and slowly but surely I am getting there.

Dating in modern time is hard because hookup culture is more prominent than committed relationships. It seems easier to just hookup due to the minimal emotional attachment and more physical pleasure. Let's thank the advancement of technology that allows us to view millions of people with just a swipe in the comfort of our own home.This is what has the hookup culture booming because you can arrange your desires with minimal effort and no time leading to a decrease in possible relationship. I myself have gone through a bunch of these apps and can tell you that I count on my hand the guys that were interested in more than hookups. I've gone on many dates and a few took an interesting turn. For blog purposes lets say his name is John (I know very basic heheh). I met John through this app called Happn and thought okay lets grab coffee after work since our work wasn't too far from each other. We set a time to meet at Starbucks (Iced Caramel Macchiato is AMAZING!). Conversation was going well and after awhile it took a 180 and changed to politics and rights. Don't get me wrong I love to stimulate the brain but John sat in front of me and began telling me how he does not believe women will ever be equal to men. I was so surprised to hear this especially from someone who has three older sisters and is on a coffee date with a woman. I was caught off guard but still stayed however the conversation did not seem to get better at all.

Another reason why I think dating is hard is because of social media and movies. These media outlets tend to shower us with images of what love must look like and if it doesn't then we move on. They show us that we have to focus on the physical appearances and status rather than who the person is on the inside. I found this quote by Oscar Wilde and I had to share it: "You don't love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car but because they sing a song only you can hear". These words are very pure and I believe in this 100%. Because of these unrealistic images and expectations we focus on the negative aspects of the person rather than what is right. These outlets show us that fun and games are becoming more popular these days and after the initial spark wears off and boredom kicks in we go out looking for another spark. When I was younger I was definitely guilty of this but as I grew I realized that to find someone you want to be in a relationship with you have to know and love yourself in order to love someone else and give them the time and love they also deserve.

However, I still believe that as long as we are open, patient and genuine with ourselves and others we will find someone that we can be in a committed relationship with. The most important thing that I have learned throughout my experiences and my friends is to always remain true to yourself!

"Love is the most beautiful thing to have, hardest thing to earn and the most painful to lose"

#beyourself #alwaysgiveityourall #nooneisperfect #dontgiveupandremainfocusedonyourgoal

NEXT POST WILL BE A COLLAB WITH COUPLES & FRIENDS ON DO'S AND DON'TS WHILE DATING!!